So it begins…
Welcome to my blog. I’ve named it Naturally Whole because I believe health and wellness are related to wholeness; mental, physical and spiritual. I believe most of us, whether we are willing to admit it or not, are on a journey towards feeling more whole in our selves. And that a state of dysfunction and poor health ensues the more disjointed we are internally. This manifests in countless health problems but also in poor mental and spiritual health.
Yesterday was the 17th Anniversary of 9/11. Like most people, my memories of that day are vivid. Yesterday I found myself thinking and meditating on the word “community”. On that day in 2001, our entire world suddenly became one community. There were heroic acts of kindness and bravery happening large and small all over the world. There is real healing power in community.
My community then was different than it is now. Most of my friends then have since moved away. And I was just twenty-four years old. I’m not sure, at least up until that day, I really had thought much about the idea of community.
Today I feel eternally grateful for my community in New York. Through sheer luck, my next door neighbor has become one of my closest friends. She was there to feed my kids (and me) and wipe my tears and pack my clothes in the wreckage of my brother’s sudden death. I felt held and safe enough to fall apart.
My community at my kids’ school is my tribe. I have easily a half dozen people I can call on to help me when I need it— and I do! When I’m stuck and can’t get to pickup in time, if my kids are into some mischief I don’t know about, or when I had a God-awful subway ride 35 weeks pregnant with a toddler and just needed a good cry. These people have had my back with a glass of wine and a laugh. I am so grateful.
Who you spend time with— your community— is a great predictor of your own health and longevity. If your friends are overweight and obese, you have a much greater chance of becoming obese yourself. If your friends are avid athletes, say, or into healthy cooking, you are much more likely to be healthy too. And the best news of all? You get to choose your community!
So choose wisely. Our friends need our help when they are down and suffering, yes. We can lift each other up. But if you are surrounding yourself with people who make you feel less than, or who remain committed to unhealthy behaviors, or are psychologically unhealthy it’s time to ask yourself if it’s really worth it for you. Our communities rise when we rise and fall when we fall. So it’s imperative that we hold ourselves accountable for our own actions and help to push others to gravitate toward wholeness too. Living well takes work, on everybody’s part.
So I encourage you to take stock of your community. How are they helping you be better and more whole? Where are the gaps, or the people whose narcissism eats away you? The friends who you know you make worse choices around? Do you have people you can depend on in a crisis? And who can depend on you?
As humans, we are geared toward wholeness. And we are all connected in this endeavor, whether we like it or not. I’m hoping to create a community with this blog, people of like-minded spirit.
Take a minute to express your gratitude for your community. I send a huge and divine thank you to my community in New York and elsewhere. I am a better and more whole person because of them.
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